Day 3 - Friday, August 7th

What made me smile today?

Tying Baby's hair into a ponytail this morning and seeing the photo - his hair is so lovely I can't bear to cut it, but that also means he is mistaken for a girl 100% of the time

Reading Baby's favourite book to him for something like the 10th time

Realising that when Baby sways from side to side it usually means he's *really* happy (and/or singing a song)

After months of using my arm as an elephant trunk as I make an elephant noise whenever we see a picture of an elephant (usually in his animal book) Baby this morning raised his arm and made a noise (not quite elephant like) when he saw the elephant in his animal book - my heart melted

What triggered me today?

This morning was full of triggers... both Baby and I were grumpy this morning. But 2 incidents stand out. The first was when I was pulling out Baby's chair for lunch - I raised my voice when he played with the box by the bin (something he is not allowed to do) and I moved him back to his play area. That incident came after many trying moments the entire morning... how does one not eventually get frustrated? The second was when I was cooking dinner he was playing by my feet and he ended up pulling out the panel underneath the oven - again I was frustrated because I was cooking and didn't have time to explain to him not to play with the panel. It's problematic because I do allow him to be with me in the kitchen while I'm cooking because I know he just wants to be close, but that does mean that the potential for triggers is much higher as my attention is divided - is there a better way?

What would I have done differently today?

I would have been less stern... I remember being rather stern today.

What will I try to do tomorrow?

Be a bit more efficient writing my journal entry? Why did today's take so long? Perhaps there was more to reflect on today.

What am I grateful for?

Baby is healthy and happy. Seeing fb posts from Friends of Finlay makes my heart cry - he's suffered so much, yet is still so strong and has so much spirit. He's not much older than Baby.